A Mile in those Bridal Shoes!

 

Another fine morning. Another great day. The Sun is out, spreading mild warmth and radiance all over, its shine so impeccable that even the dew drops on those nascent flowers imitate it. Soaking in, these positive vibes, I move over to check, what's happening around the world, with my friends, on Facebook. Nothing new! A friend enjoying snow, abroad, our PM Modi yet again managing to mesmerize the crowd, a friend getting married, is among a few prominent posts I see, until its too late for my class. But while getting ready for the class, while commuting to the college, while ongoing lectures, while taking lunch, I notice, a thought, perhaps a fragment, has managed to follow me all through this while. Its about me, about you and about all the Indian men, their so called manliness and most importantly, about our future/current brides.

Almost everyday we find out, that our friend or relative is tying the knot. But the more prominent thought that strikes the mind, is "Are we really ready for marriage, are we worthy for our brides, are we ready to commit fully and wholeheartedly to our better halves?"

Lets consider a bride's perspective for proper dissection of the above questions raised. She has dreamed of this day since her childhood. A day which will be her greatest and happiest day. She has all the plans ready for this glorious day. A day where she will not be less than a Princess, soon to elope with her Knight in Shining Armour! She would happily leave her home, PERMANENTLY, her identity, her near and dear ones just for him.(I have stayed in hostel for many years, so I know how it is like to leave home even for few months!)

But the real question is, are you(grooms) ready for marriage? A girl, leaving everything, her home, her parents, even her last name, behind, coming in and settling with you, is a great deed. It speaks volumes of her generosity and adjusting nature. Now, you are the only one, she will look upto, whenever she needs anything. Your family, your home, your friends and relatives are all new for her. She will take time to blend in. Give her that. So every time she makes oval rotis, or a little too bitter coffee, don't complain, instead adjust with her just like she is adjusting with you! Considering, how modern we call ourselves, respect her opinion pertaining to carry on with her job, because just as you feel the sense of independence and non-reliance on others, she might want to feel the same way and maybe would be planning to take that extra burden off your shoulders. Whenever there are little issues raised, take her stand, because you are the only one she relies on, wholly and fully. There will be cases where she might be wrong too, so instead of pouncing on her and ringing your victory bells, try and make her understand the points she missed out on.

Commitment is not just physical, but committing to stand with her, by her side in all her ups and downs, committing to be there when she needs it the most, committing to respect her opinion and her values, committing to listen her out whenever she wants you to, committing to help her with her flaws and weaknesses and help her overcoming it, committing to not change her and adjust to her and love her just the way she is, committing to not sulk over petty things and celebrate each and every inch of her, committing to be of a broader perspective and support her for all her future endeavors, committing to give her a hug whenever she feels down, committing to love her and  be her's, come what may!

Love is a beautiful thing. Don't lose it, revolving around petty issues and irrelevant stuff.  Hold her hand and let go off yourself. Cherish it with her and in the process cherish her too!

Half way Home

 

Home, a place where you can sit out, relax, reminiscent, talk with your own self, a place where you can find solace and tranquility, a place surrounded by your loved ones-always there to guide you, mold you, scold you-loved ones who will always stand out for you, no matter what, loved ones who can shift gears from being a caring parent to a budding friend!

Last time when I left home, I was heartsick. The thought of not coming back here, the thought of spending the coming behemoth 2 months without seeing my loved ones, the very thought of things to never remain as they were, was spine-chilling. How I wished to finish off things quickly and head back home. Packing back my stuff seemed arid. I cursed myself and how, for making the reservations, that I so wanted not to go back. The thought of leaving behind something so beautiful, so special, brought shivers down my spine, especially when you know it won't be the same again. Ever! Its during those few final minutes, when you realize the importance and the gravity of the things that are so close to your heart, that you think your heart will sink. Its during that times, when you wish you had few more minutes, just to clench that thing tightly and never let go! Its during that time, when you pray stealthily and demand for some extra time and a few more. But the harsh reality is that it never happens.

You feel that trauma, that fire, burning inside you, biting you for quite a few days or weeks. The feeling of home-sickness takes a toll and everything seems dull. It took me quite a few days, as a matter of fact, few weeks to get out of that feeling, until everything went back to normal, until spending time with friends, back at hostel, was fun. Friends, the ones who are sarcastic, the ones who can be a real pain in the ass, the ones who are always there for your cover and guide you during the hard times, the ones who we enjoy being with, also constitute an important part of life. Friends, a home away from home. I have this awesome family back here, which I know, will stand by my side, no matter what!

The moment has finally arrived,its in the near vicinity. Its the time to head back home, to head back to your loved ones, to your bunch of crazy friends, back home, who also have been counting days, just like you, who are busy preparing crazy New year plans and to-do lists with you, From the time you keep your first step in your hometown, till you are fully satiated with the love and joy of togetherness. But something deep down is surfacing now and its bothering. I know how I've waited for these two long months to pass. But as the end is approaching, I feel like not going. Perhaps, I want to stay here, with my friends, enjoy life as it passes by, to the fullest. Perhaps, its the love and the never ending affection that is holding me back. Perhaps, the good times that we all have encountered together and laughing hard at the memories that followed, till our stomachs' hurt. Perhaps, its the home-bound feeling that has settled deep down and is not that strong now.

Perhaps, I have the pleasure of having two families, so closely knit to my heart that I just cant afford to leave one behind.!

NIGHT

The first word that comes to our mind when someone calls out night is ‘Dark’. Perceptions change from people to people, some consider it mystical, while some consider it merely a time to relax and sleep. And here I am writing this piece with nothing in mind, sitting on the rooftop, exploring various unseen, perhaps not, features of ’Night’.

Actually when there is nothing in your mind, you start to see and witness things differently, and that is perhaps the best part of a blank mind. There is something in this night that charms, attracts me. May it be its silent nature, its dark aura or its mystic connection which probably scares the shit out of me?

Beneath the shining stars, in the pale moonlight, enjoying the cool breeze, I am standing in one corner and thinking,” What should I write which is not written about ‘Night’?” In this cool breeze, I hear mild melodies of Wind-chimes and I witness tress swaying to and fro as if they are dancing to the tunes. Suddenly my focus shifts from ongoing thought to some Canines barking foolishly on an endless road. Suddenly, God knows from where, I think of the endless road and somehow it seems identical to my future. After all, my future is also a journey of dreams, desires which need to be fulfilled, where there are no companions, where I have to cross this ‘Endless’ road all by myself. As soon as I recall companions and night, all together at the same time, what I recall is the series of carefree night-outs, where roaming after midnight was like taking a tour of an isolated, vacant city, where, the feeling of fresh gush of wind through my hair was perhaps the best memory, where, I can savor the fun even with my eyes closed.

Suddenly my thoughts are interrupted by mild rains, and I throw a glance at my surroundings, noticing its dawn already and still I am so much engrossed in my thoughts. Leaving my thoughts aside, I enjoy the mild rain with its cologne i.e. the smell of fresh clay.

 Perhaps the ‘Night’ is over and so is my blog!